I couldn’t function for a day

I was contemplating whether to even put it out here. So here it is because it has been piling up more and more each remarks / comments given. But how do I do it without painting the whole picture in details?

As a whole I feel like I need to be the one to compromise all the time. Even my timing has to fit into other’s schedule and not having one that is my own. It seems like I am the one having to adjust my timing according to the other. Whether I am baking (in which this is something that is therapeutic to me, now when I think of baking, it leaves me a sense of irk.), or moving about in the morning (I’m an early riser), I need to keep in mind of the noise and timing. Like why am I the one constantly moving about your own schedule? What gets to me is that the reasons you give is like I’m affecting greatly on you. Just because I don’t voice out or always let you have your way, you are like making the whole space you own. When you change up your routine, I had to accommodate to it, but when I change mine, I need to give a heads up?

Things are not going your way, you get sulky about it. Well, look around, nobody is getting things going their way too. There is no point to fight back / stand up for myself when you always need to have the last say.

How long more I can live with this? A question that I ask myself.

Till then, stay sane ~ ! (much needed now)

Craving for content

Every morning when I wake up, the first thing that I reach out for is my phone. Not to start scrolling social media apps but to check on what notifications I have because I put my phone on DND (do not disturb) mode. After that I will reach out for my Switch to get the day started for Animal Crossing ACNH. Then my whole day will be just finidng any live streams that I’ve missed or to see anyone that I follow is having any live streams going on. Yes, it’s all about ACNH ever since my obsession start.

I tend to find myself hoping that there will be some kind of content from the people I follow everyday. Here I am wanting to consume others’ content everyday, waiting and searching for them, yet I do not produce any. This got my thinking that I am not making any effort to execute the ideas I have in my head. I am just wishing it would happen with super minimal effort. Of course that’s not how things work. You gotta make effort in order to reap its rewards. You reap what you sow. While I am wishing to be able to create some sort of content and ideas I got inside my head, I am just procrastinating.

Consistency is what I am lacking. I don’t think I have even reach to any level of feeling burnout, not even the tip of the iceberg of it. The only thing I am consistent so far is playing the game everyday for 3.5 weeks now. There is always one thing that I can highlight and eleborate further. Simple things can make my head run wild with thoughts and ideas. Catching that train of thought to pen them down is the challenge. Once the thought has passed, I can’t recall much of it. Should I challenge myself by laying down a plan?

I DON’T think I should do that as I would not stick to it. The reason is there is no end goal reward for me. Like yes, I could think that I am being productive with my time, having some content going on, exercising my skill and in a way improving. Yet, that is still not enough drive for me to do so. I know myself. I know that I am going to be on fire momentarily, after that it will die down then the whole cycle repeats itself.

Till then, stay sane ~ !

Say goodbye

I have done it after months of contemplating.

I was the few that started using the app when it first launched (more like forced to use it due to work). It was fun then as most of the users are colleagues as the company I worked for then created the app. The community then was just us and colleagues from other parts of the world. Slowly as time passed, the community evolved (of course). With the new acquisition of the app to another company and I am no longer with the company, the community within the app has slowly become less relevant to me. I didn’t follow much about the whole saving the app movement and when that happened, the comaderie throughout the period of buying out. I don’t feel strongly attached to the app to begin with as it was just an app that I was required to use. Actually I don’t even feel attached to it at all. It’s just another app for me to use, another platform to update.

I like the concept of the app. I use it to jot down the little random thoughts that goes through my head where the character count is more that what twitter allows. It’s an app where I can straight away type down an incident without waiting till I’m back to my laptop since my phone is always with me. One of the most interesting story I have documented is my public transport journey to and from work. I even have a creepy story from that that the full story is in Dayre. I do think I still have that exported. I might share it here one day, well if I remember.

With the acquisition of the app, it went through a revamp and new functions have been introduced. One of them, the most significant one for me is the subscription fee. I don’t have a problem with that. It just doesn’t justify the money I’m paying while I hardly use the app. I stayed on for a few months just to see how it goes, whether will I open the app, continue to upload consistently, read the stories posted there, just utilising the app. As I’ve mentioned, I became distant to the community seeing that I no longer find the stories or information there relevant to me anymore. I thought I could just see pass that, in the end it is just another platform for me to upload. Amidst the existing ones that are heavily utilised, contents are getting diluted being that I like to segregate my content to fit each platform. In addition, I stayed on dayre even after I left the company is all because of the sticker packs that they have. After dayre has a face lift, the stickers function seems to be non existence in a way whereby there is nowhere to download the sticker packs other than searching for a specific sticker in order to download the whole pack. That’s a bummer. Therefore, minus 1 point for me to continue.

I always need to bring myself back to basics. I feel like I need to straighten out my life every now and then. This quarantine period is one of them moments to throw out what’s not relevant and redundant.

I left the app somewhere hidden from sight for a month or so to see if I would even remember to go in and have a look. Nope, a month was up and I don’t even miss the app. Hence I went to unsubscribe when it was nearing the end of term. Closing in to one month now since I free my credit card off the payment, I don’t miss it nor regret one bit. It’s a wise choice to free myself off dayre. That’s all to the main story of goodbye dayre.

Till then, stay sane ~ !

HELLO!

Where shall I begin with this? Came to WordPress to find out of some new changes that I will need to adapt as anyhow they are changing it starting from 1st June, 2020. There’s no way that I can opt out of this option as I’ve been doing for the past months. Since the last entry, I’ve been on ground for 2 months now from end of March. A few incidents worth highlighting throughout this quarantine / lockdown / restricted movement.

  1. Staying cooped up in the confinement of the house walls for a month.
  2. Ups and mostly downs of living with a flatmate 24/7 for a month.
  3. Up-keeping of my own room.
  4. Creating a routine.
  5. How to maintain my sanity.
  6. Not having to work at all for 2 months as to date.
  7. Buying a Nintendo Switch!

Now that I’m given so much of free time, I can do the things that I have been putting off right? Like making videos, blogging, crocheting. HOWEVER, whenever I plan to do something, it doesn’t turn out that way or it’s gonna be only for a week or two. In a long run, it’s not gonna sustain. I DID managed to workout for 14 days straight and kept it up for another 2 weeks. When I started my obsession with Animal Crossing New Horizons, all workouts and crochet project went out the window and door. A week plus after my obsession, I’ve obtain the hiked price Switch and the game. Yay! From then until now, I’m just playing it day and night, watching videos related to it, watching people stream playing the game, EVERYTHING is just about the game. Well, I can’t go out or visit friends (not that I have ben doing that before this whole fiasco), I’m just feeding my new obsession so much so that I am not improving my skills.

There was a conversation among some people around me. What happens if I am out of my current job, what am I going to do then? My immediate answer that I can go to / think of is to do my crochet project and/or start streaming me playing game. I could also stream live eating just for laughs, who knows what’s that path gonna take me. At this moment, I could live off my savings for a few months, let say 3 month because I don’t want to deplete my whole savings. That would be enough push for me to get my butt to do something to generate some income. Yes, when I’m in my comfort zone, I don’t feel the urge to make things happen. That’s what I am in right now.

Thanks to sgrmse for that constant reminder about this dusty blog site that is sooooooooooo under use. So there’s to you sgrmse, a little shoutout to you for that push I need to come back to blogging, the sound of my keyboards clicking away, putting my thoughts into words, be a little bit more productive in the things that I like.

Till then, stay sane ~ !

We meet again London: Burger & Lobster

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Much delayed blog post for this. I left it with the photos in the draft since 11 Feb. Every time when I have nothing to do, I tell myself that I needed to finish this. But look at the date now. So much for self-discipline. My last entry about London, I mentioned that the next time I’m around town, I will make a visit to Burger & Lobster.

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And so I did!

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Was thinking to order me a lobster, however upon seeing the price and calculating the cash on hand, I opted for something else. Full lobster shall be for another day. I have forgotten how pricey it is too. My server recommended me to have a starter in which of course I am up for it, they are fresh oysters after all.

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I’ve got one each of the oysters that were recommended to me. Jersey oyster (small, left) and Poole oyster (big, right). The Jersey oyster has a much stronger flavour which is to my liking, whereas the Poole Oyster has a much lighter flavour. I’ve paired my oysters with some spicy mignonette sauce. With a squeeze of fresh lemon and the sauce, I was slightly in oyster heaven while I slurped them down.

As for the main course, I could not decide what to order while I am on my limited budget. Since I am in a place of burger and lobster, I got myself a burger with lobster in it too!

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The Beast Burger with an extra order of fries on the side. It is an 8oz beef patty topped with grilled lobster meat, brie, truffle and tarragon mayo, fennel and Chinese cabbage. I love the serving portion of it. For the price I am paying, the portion of lobster meat and burger patty were not disappointing. I enjoyed every bite of it.

Who else eats their fries first before digging into the main dish?

In total, I’ve spent GBP 36 (including tax). You could find many branches of Burger & Lobster around London.

I would love to dine in Burger & Lobster again when I do have more cash with me and maybe other companions to have a sharing platter.

Till then, stay sane!

I think I will settle down with a beach view

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The beach is my home. I feel so calm and relax when the (cool) sea breeze brushes my face and flows through my hair. I could easily sit by the beach for hours under the shade of course. I’ve been seeing lately on my Instagram feed of a few friends visiting this place back home – Puteh Beach Bar.

Interesting to find out that there is such a place in this little town of mine to chill and Instagram worthy too. It is situated in the beachside area of town which is not too far from my house. The nearest beach is less than 10 mins away. This is farther out from the main town. According to my friend that took me there, the bar is a separate entity from the resort premise. If you know the facts about the bar, do comment down below!

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I spent the whole afternoon there sipping away while enjoying the cool breeze wind blowing. We went there straight after lunch, at 2pm when the crowd is nowhere to be found. I love it when there’s nobody else around. It feels like the whole area is just for me. As 4pm approaches, people started to fill in the tables while some photo-ops sessions going on. I can’t miss out on taking some photos for and of myself too. I think I might have brought out the Instagram boyfriend material from my friend. Only with minimal instructions and guidance, I’m done in less than 10 mins.

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I like this life I’m living now. Can just sit down by the beach, sipping down my cold drink with no crowd and noise. Hopefully, I get to do this still for years to come. If such a life is retirement, I’m retired.

Till then, stay sane!